Review
Part of homeschooling is teaching life skills, but parents of special needs children spend significantly more time helping their children learn about living in “the real world.” The world can be a confusing place for all of us as we mature from child to teenager to adult. Add to that confusion a lack of understanding unwritten social rules, and you can imagine the frustration for those growing up with high-functioning autism and Asperger’s syndrome. Kari Dunn Buron wrote a solution–A 5 Is Against the Law! Social Boundaries: Straight Up!
A 5 Is Against the Law is NOT a rule book. Kari writes plainly and frankly to teens and young adults about how to deal with life’s changes. She uses her 5-point scale to teach her readers how others feel and how to use self-control and calming mechanisms. She empowers them with tools and strategies for navigating the awkwardness of life. Putting emotions and behavior into a scale makes it easier for autism spectrum individuals to tackle emotional issues. On page four of this easy-to-read book, the scale is this:
5=Physically hurtful or threatening behavior
4=Scary behavior
3=Odd behavior
2=Reasonable behavior
1=Very informal social behavior
Dunn Buron explains that there are things we do as children that are not socially acceptable when we become older. For example, people dismiss staring at someone when you’re little. They understand you’re not trying to be rude. However, when you get to be a teenager or an adult and are still staring at people, it can make others uncomfortable and even concerned.
I really appreciate that A 5 Is Against the Law does not patronize or use a condescending tone. Kari simply explains what this age group needs to know. She explains that if your behavior is often a 4 or 5, even though you did not intend to hurt someone or scare them, you may be asked not to return to the sports team or your job. Kari also appeals to a young person’s desire for independence as a motive for learning how to become more successful at social interaction. She suggests looking to others they trust for guidance when they don’t understand a situation. But instead of making them feel more out of place, Kari informs them that everyone has difficulty understanding other people at some time. She gives strategies such as “Three Strikes, You’re Out” and using a flow chart, and also using the 5-point scale for self-monitoring behavior. Living with my little list-maker, I can see how a flow chart would be very helpful to him as he gets older. Kari tactfully deals with issues such as what could appear to be sexual harrassment, so you will want to read the book first so you can decide how to approach it with your teenager. She is completely appropriate, but each child has varying levels of maturity.
Social workers can use A 5 is Against the Law with groups and parents can use this book with their individual child. There are places for the student to work through his own situations and write possible solutions. It is a fantastic tool to help adolescents and young adults adapt to society’s changing expectations of them. I highly recommend A 5 is Against the Law and suggest you pass this information on to anyone you know who has an older spectrum child or works with middle school and high school students with Asperger’s or high-functioning autism. They will be able to improve their quality of life very quickly by implementing Kari’s strategies.
About the Reviewer
From the publisher’s website: Kari Dunn Buron, M.S., is the coordinator of an ASD certificate program for educators at Hamline University in St. Paul. MN. She recently retired from K-12 special education after more than 30 years. Kari is one of the founding members of the MN Autism Network, a statewide group of Autism Resource Specialists, and a past president of the Autism Society of Minnesota. She has spent 17 years working with the Autistic Society of Trinidad and Tobago, where she travels annually to volunteer in homes and schools. In 1995, Kari developed Camp Discovery, a summer camp for youth with Asperger Syndrome. In 2003, she received a fellowship that allowed her to study social cognition and ASD from an international perspective.
From the publisher’s website: AAPC Publishing specializes in providing mainstream, hands-on advice and information to parents, educators and others about topics related to autism spectrum disorders. Accordingly, our books are more practical than technical. We are proud of our reputation for publishing only well-written, well-edited books, even when this means turning down authors whose work does not meet our standards.
This sounds like a phenomenal resource. Does she offer anything for preteens? I have a 10 yo who could really benefit from something like this, but a teen book is definitely above her maturity level. Will go check out her website!
Melonie, You could look for her book about the five point scale and use it with your daughter. You could also use this book as a guide. Some of it would be too old, but some not.
My 12 year old has been recently diagnosed. I’ve been looking for a resource that he can easily understand and use. He is having difficulty understanding verbal communication and actions a typical might use. I’m looking forward to helping my son this book
Kimberly, I’d definitely look into it. A big part of the book, as I mentioned in my review, is about how certain behaviors are ok when we’re little, but not when we’re older. I think your son will appreciate that Kari does not talk down to him, but very matter of factly, just like Aspies like.
Sounds like a great resource, but like Melonie my child is only 10. After reading myself, I think you would be able to use the scales and charts for younger ages with guidance.
The Incredible 5-Point Scale is a guide to teach adults how to use the scale w/anyone for those of you with “tweens”. For younger children, Kari wrote a picture book “When My Worries Get Too Big”. My son loves it.
Thank you for sharing this! This book sounds perfect for my daughter.
Ordered the book after reading your review. Patiently waiting for it to arrive….
Michelle, please come back and leave your thoughts and choose your own star rating! I’d love to hear a review from someone else.